Thursday, January 28, 2010

A Letter to Ladybug



My Dearest LadyBug,

You are eight years old right now. My how you're growing. Sometimes more quickly than I would like you to (or care to admit). It looks like [at this point] you will be our second and last baby and although you will continue to grow, I will never stop thinking of you as my "baby". However...
Recently you had a very restless night sleep. Up and down all night - back and forth, back and forth to your room I traveled through the dimly lit house. One o'clock am, two o'clock am, and finally at three o'clock am I decided I would simply stay in your room with you - to save myself, yet, another journey to and fro.

I gently prompted you to move over and squeezed, comfortably beside you in the small twin bed. I quietly prayed in your ear and whispered the words of Jesus Love Me and Amazing Grace. You whispered [sang] it with me for quite some time (my how you love to sing), but finally you fell fast asleep curled up next to me, holding my hand tightly.

As you slumbered, I watched you. I watched and remembered. How tiny your hands used to be. So tiny that your entire fist couldn't muster enough girth to embrace my one finger. But now, you've grown ~ still growing. You no longer need me to nurse you. You no longer need me to lace your shoes. You no longer even need me to help you write your name. And as I lay there next to my "baby" and stroked the still soft skin of your hand - I was taken back in time and for a moment you needed me as much at that moment as the day you were born.

Your hand didn't, at that moment, seem as big as it usually does. Your nose was still a cute little button decorating your face, and your lips - still the shape of a petite little heart. And right then - I felt God slow the clock for me - to bask in remembrances of a time that I thought I'd allowed to slip away - to be forgotten.

And it was at that moment that it occurred to me - you ARE still my "baby" and you DO still need me - only in differing ways. Yesterday I kissed boo-boo's all better, today I look at the toads you catch, and tomorrow I'll hold the blessed child that will so remind me of you when you were a baby - your daughter, my grand "baby".

I fell asleep that night resting in the love that I have for you and thanking God that He gave you to me. That I was allowed the privilege to be your Momma, to teach you the things of Him. And for now and evermore - I'll love you just as if you were my "baby".

I love you.
Mommy

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Looking at blogs, for me, is like driving down the street at night and happening by a house that has all its curtains wide open with the lights on... you get a quick glance into someone else's life.

So, friend, please leave a message... I'm leaving the curtains wide open and all the lights are on. I'd love to chat with ya! (and I try to respond to all my comments)

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